I try to stay away from TLC’s hit series “90 Day Fiancé,” but… psych! When did I try to do that? I love it! HAHA!

I already did a review here and here about previous seasons, but this season right here? THIS SEASON RIGHT HERE?! I don’t think I can take any of these couples seriously. 🤦🏾‍♀️

I had to watch this season because they had yet another Nigerian in it, and you know I was all up in the storyline of Michael and Angela before.

This season on “90 Day Fiancé: Before the 90 Days,” there’s a Lisa and Usman.

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Lisa and Usman

First off, Lisa and Angela are very much alike. They’re older caucasian women with heavyset builds and blond hair who are head-over-heals for their guys.

Instead of “AHN-jeh-lah, beh-bee please,” you’ll be hearing a lot of, “Lee-za. Beh-bee love.”

Baby love? Whatever gets those American passports women hooked I suppose.

I stuck up for Michael, though. I said that even if he were scamming Angela, he absolutely earned the right to get on American soil with all the hoops he jumped through.

Usman? Not so much. I’m not convinced. He wants to be a superstar rapper in America. He already goes by a cool stage name and everything in his village. It’s Sojaboy. With a unique name like that, you’re bound to succeed.

Lisa goes to Nigeria to beg Usman’s mom to allow her to marry Usman. (His mom believes that Lisa will take Usman back to America to become a slave.) The mom finally agrees, but I have a feeling that it’s just the beginning for those two.

Ed and Rosemarie

And then there’s Ed and Rosemarie. Rosemarie is a young lady from the Philippines who has a 4-year-old son. Ed is very short and overweight, but he has money. (Please refer to my relationship scale to see how this is possible.)

Ed called himself ugly, which was kind of sad to hear; but then he had the nerve to question if Rosemarie was just with him to get a better life in America. You already know what the deal is, sir! 

He goes to the Philippines, acts a spoiled 1,500-thread count fool, and then contemplates whether he has truly found his bride.

Yolanda and Williams

Prayer warriors, please add Sister Yolanda to your prayer list. She fell in love with a man who claims he is from England, yet he clearly sounds Nigerian on the phone. Plus, she has never video called him ever in life.

Sister Yolanda has about six kids and a late husband. We’ll assume that mourning will make you do some crazy things because it is quite embarrassing how her adult daughter is proving to have more sense than her. WHILLIAMS (with a hard ‘h’ and English accent), show yourself!

Darcey and Tom

And saints, please remove Darcey and Tom from your prayer list. I cautioned you about adding them in the first place.

Darcey is the hot mess of a Connecticut woman who throws herself at any man who looks decent and will pay attention to her. She has managed to have two explosive and televised breakups with foreign men.

The tears, the anguish, the surprise that a man will get annoyed with an overly emotional, overly dramatic woman—I can’t.

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But wait! There’s more!

There’s a relationship expert who feels he’s still single and says all the right things, a reformed ex-con who is trying to find his Russian princess, a YouTube star who acts completely different in person, and a man who has been getting catfished for seven years by a Ukrainian. 👍🏾

We’ll be diving into the best storylines in this week’s video. Get your popcorn ready! 🍿