Everybody’s waiting for baby bump pictures. Some people have even asked if they can be the photographer for my maternity pictures. And to them I say, “Thanks, but no thanks.”

No tea, no shade (I’m getting the hang of using that phrase 😉 ) on those who take pregnancy pictures. You guys look great, you’re glowing, and the world is your oyster. However, for Big Mama H over here, those pictures will be nothing but depressing.

I’m up about 15 pounds at week 29. Yes, it’s mostly stomach, but who cares? I feel like a whale all the same. Lol! My mom didn’t take maternity pictures, I never asked to see them, and I don’t miss out on not seeing my mom with me inside of her. I believe she was pregnant—I don’t need proof.

And just like that, maternity pics got that much creepier to me…

And don’t even get me started on those awkward “creative” photos I see floating around. Being in a grassy field with your husband is cute, but sitting on a horse draped in a white flowy sheet is not. Don’t believe me? See for yourself! (And if you dare, scroll through the rest of the slide show to see more maternity pic epic fails.)

My little man will have plenty of pics after he is born, so we don’t need to start his photo album before he’s welcomed into this world.

Besides, if I EVER decide to go back on my word and show a little belly action, I’ll just ask my sister to snap something real quick using her cell phone. HAHA! (I’m cheap, remember?)